For sale! Polycarbonate!

"Spanfeller is a twat" (theaspiringengineer)
01/29/2019 at 20:25 • Filed to: None

President Obrador has gone all Marie Kondo. Put ting on sale over two hundred vehicles that belong to the Federal government’s VIP fleet. It might upset his predeces or who was clearly very fond of GMT900s.

The auction includes one hundred and seventy bulletproof SUVs, seven HD trucks, twenty three pickup trucks, nine compacts, thirty motorcycles, twelve semis, two tractors(?), two buses and five trailers. Obrador wishes to recoup five million dollars from the sale. Which is, erm, very little considering the kinds of cars they’re selling;

Bulletproof, top of the line vehicles...

-Audi A8 W12 Security: 100,000USD

-BMW X5 Security: 40,000USD

-Chevrolet Suburban 4.7 ton: 43,500USD

-Chevrolet Suburban diesel Bulletproof: 80,000USD

-Chevrolet Suburban 3.8 ton: 51,000USD

-Chevrolet Suburban 5.4 ton: 46,000USD

Why so many vehicles? Well, because bulletproofing’s worst enemy is vibration, and when you have up to three tons of it, you’ve got yourself some issues with the comparatively lousy frames of the Suburbans.

So whenever Peña Nieto went outside of Mexico City (Like he did every few days ), he was shuffled around in a helicopter, while a crew of technicians and truckers flatbeded the bulletproof vehicles to whichever destination he had. That way the trucks would be subject to fewer vibrations and would last longer.... supposedly .

Obrador used to be driven in a VW Jetta, but now he’s shuffled around in full size SUVs. The reason? His wife made him do so... or so he said. Though, it’s clear that the Ford Expedition he is being transported in is not bulletproof.

It’s great that they’re selling all of it, but it’s even stranger that I somehow found a way to spin this the bad way.

He talked about the auction during his morning press release, which is kind of a joke. The funds will supposedly go to the national guard but like, why is he wasting his time on it? This sale will be equivalent to 0.0017% of the federal budget this year. It is clear that he does this because he likes the attention.

Also, he has a perfectly fine 787 sitting in some hangar in California until it finds a new home(at an undisclosed cost). But he’s a showman.

And the show must go on.

DISCUSSION (16)

  > Spanfeller is a twat
01/29/2019 at 20:32

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RallyWrench > Spanfeller is a twat
01/29/2019 at 20:45

I’m sure these will in no way find their way into the hands of criminals.

Spanfeller is a twat > RallyWrench
01/29/2019 at 20:47

He did promise that.

But used bulletproof cars are the way drug dealers get security, so maybe an A8 will start appearing in the streets of Culiacan

DipodomysDeserti > Spanfeller is a twat
01/29/2019 at 20:55

Gotta raise funds for that wall you guys are supposed to be paying for. That invoice should be coming any day now...

Spanfeller is a twat > DipodomysDeserti
01/29/2019 at 20:58

I mean, he could also raise taxes on the rich and finish the airport but you know, cabes ita de algodon ’ll find a way.

Probenja > Spanfeller is a twat
01/29/2019 at 21:06

At least here in Chile the cars used by the government go to auctions all the time, they even have a website for it. O ur presidential cars are also not bulletproof, the current one is a standard Genesis G90.

MrDakka > Spanfeller is a twat
01/29/2019 at 21:08

First, w ho’s Marie Kondo? Does she sell condos?

Second, what year is the X5?

atfsgeoff > Spanfeller is a twat
01/29/2019 at 21:09

Say he meets his 5 million goal. How much money was spent actually organizing and holding the auction? I’m guessing a million.

Spanfeller is a twat > atfsgeoff
01/29/2019 at 21:19

Moving all of those plus storage plus any legal requirements plus personnel, I think it’s gonna cost 200,000 usd tops. Remember shit is super cheap here.

Its a low bar, 5m, it assumes the cars will go at a 20,000USD average which is insanely low.

Now, selling this shit is meaningless if he’s selling the airplane too, because the depreciation on that is inmense

Spanfeller is a twat > MrDakka
01/29/2019 at 21:20

2015-2016 I think

The x5 and the A8 are for diplomatic service.

Spanfeller is a twat > Probenja
01/29/2019 at 21:22

Yeah we also hold auctions all the time, its just that Obrador likes talking.

A G90 is a nice car, very presidential and not very stupidly expensive like a fleet of burbans’

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > Spanfeller is a twat
01/29/2019 at 21:26

That is why “the beast” is on a on a gmt 560 frame.

Spanfeller is a twat > gmporschenut also a fan of hondas
01/29/2019 at 21:33

Yeah but the President of the USA actually has security threats.

Mexico is an unsafe country, but the people who would want to kill the president of this country don’t have the resources that the people who might want to attack the US president do.

So, did Nieto or Calderon need the security they had? Absolutely not. Which is why rather than doing it correctly and getting a Ford Excursion they got suburbans and fucked them all up with tons of plastic and metal, and in the end it didn’t matter.

Because any “terrorist” here might have an AK47, which a 40mm bulletproofing will stop with no issue. a 40mm bulletproofing is going to add, at most, 700-1000kg to a Suburban, and keep chasis damage to a minimum. Unlike whatever the fuck they did to the diesel one.

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > Spanfeller is a twat
01/29/2019 at 22:01

but the payload capacity is only 1700lbs. I would gu ara ntee they upgrade the suspension but all that stress does a number on the frame, that it’ s garbage in no time.

Spanfeller is a twat > gmporschenut also a fan of hondas
01/29/2019 at 22:26

Yes they do improve the suspension.

I once got up close with one, they have brembo brakes.

And some bulletproofing manufacturers say they turbo’ em

Vicente Esteve > MrDakka
01/31/2019 at 20:03

The X5 is 2008/2009